Let’s be honest. Parenting can be very mundane. Some days are tiring and challenging, and you may feel that you are doing nothing more than treading water. The same thing over and over — you feed, clean up after, taxi, remind, perhaps nag your children day in and day out.
Perhaps you are not seeing progress every day. Some days you may feel stuck and like you are nothing more than a maid or caregiver. I remember having days like that and it took everything within me to cast aside feelings of “what the heck am I really doing with my life? Does what I’m doing matter?”
When you have days like that, let me help by answering that last question loud and clear so that you can hear: YES, WHAT YOU ARE DOING DOES MATTER! Being present for your child is making more of a difference than you may think.
Parenthood is hard. It has its rewards and blessings for sure, but there are days when it seems like you are answering 20 questions every minute, and having a child’s voice–even as precious as it is– in your ear all day long can get tiresome. Easy tasks like going to the grocery store, trying to pick up a few things at Target or Costo, or loading the dishwasher turn into a major effort.
I remember many of those days. I was a stay-at-home mom for three kids, while doing some remote work at home. I had to juggle work and diapers for a while and I often found myself wondering if what I was doing was really all that important. Dumb question, I know, but let’s be honest, it has crossed the minds of many of you, hasn’t it?
It is usually during those mundane seasons or days that you will find yourself doubting the importance of your parenting job. And when those days come, it’s helpful to have a few truths in your mind to fight the mundane misgivings.
Truth #1: You are your child’s parent for a reason.
It is no accident that you are the parent of the child or children that you have. God has given your child the mom or dad that He knows will best care for your children. It’s up to you to do the caring, of course, but you are the very parent that your child needs.
I see this lived out very clearly with my son and daughter-in-law. My grandson, Nash, was born with cystic fibrosis and his mama, Jess, is the perfect mom for him. She was already a very health-conscious eater, but now helping Nash eat in a way that does the most to help his body thrive has taken her crunchy skills to a whole new level. She researches, asks a lot of questions, and prepares nutritious foods that are helping Nash flourish. He’s only 1.5 years old, but he is a very healthy little boy. I honestly believe God couldn’t have given our little Nash a better mom to deal with his challenges.
You have a purpose in your parenting. I truly hope that you have found it and realize that you are the parent your child needs, and that you are doing your best to be that parent.
Truth #2: Raising little humans is the most important job in the world.
You are raising the next generation of fathers, mothers, doctors, teachers, politicians, lawyers, researchers, entrepreneurs, business owners–you are shaping the leaders of tomorrow. That’s a very heavy responsibility! The character your child develops because of your guidance and love will make a difference in a very messed-up world. If you abdicate that responsibility, if you think that what you’re doing doesn’t really make a difference, then your child is left to be raised by whoever is nearby and available. And who knows what the result of that will be.
Truth #3: You don’t have to be a perfect parent.
You can make parenting mistakes and still raise great kids. My husband and I are perfect examples of that! We did things we regret as parents and things we wish we could do over. But our kids still managed to grow up to be amazing, responsible ,faith-filled, hard-working, compassionate adults. And that happened because of a lot of prayer and because we were honest about our mistakes and strived to learn from them so that we could do better the next time.
Parenting expert Sue Atkins sums it up well: “There is no such thing as a perfect parent so just be a real one.” Understanding and believing that can take a lot of pressure off of you and perhaps relieve you of some of the munane doubts that might plague you.
Truth #4: Just Being Present with your child is often all that your child needs.
Your child doesn’t need all the latest gadgets, the best camps or clinics, the coolest clothes, or the cleanest house–what they need is your love, the attention, your guidance and your presence.
Being present with your child means being engaged and focused on the moment. Being present means fully enjoying the moment that you are in. As a parent, this means listening fully, engaging in conversation, and noticing things your child does.
Sometimes being present can be even simpler than that. It may mean that you are home from school when they get home. Or that you are there to pick them up faithfully after practice. Or that you are watching from the bleachers at just about every game they play. It can also mean that you are dependable and always there when your child truly needs you. It doesn’t have to mean you are around every minute, but that you are there for the minutes that matter.
Truth #5: This too shall pass.
Remember that is only a season and it will end. It won’t be long before the mundane will be replaced by chaos, and eventually an empty nest. This stage of life, the one that’s feeling monotonous is only for a moment and you can choose to make the most of it or you can choose to wish it away. You are really the only one who can choose to see it as mundane or as an opportunitiy to do a job that is crucial to our next generation.
If you struggle with any part of parenting, schedule a free intro call with me here.
Organizer: Janis Meredith
