Can a good work/life balance really be found for busy parents? The cost of raising kids with childcare, housing, and education overwhelms many parents. Balancing jobs with caregiving responsibilities is challenging and often results in stress and anxiety for moms and dads.
Balance was a word my dad used often as I was growing up. For me it was a rather ambiguous term that was used to apply to many different situations. But when balance is applied to living a life that knows how to do what needs to be done in regards to work, but also knows how to make family a priority, it need not be vague, but rather an achievable goal.
The problem is that parents often know the importance of a work/life balance and even want it, but they still struggle to find it. If you are looking for it, perhaps these suggestions will help you:
Decide what a Work/Life Balance Means for You.
This may not look the same for everyone and it is not necessarily a balance of 50/50. Start by listing your top three priorities outside of your work. Ask yourself what areas of your life feel neglected right now. What would you like to spend less/more time on? What does your family need you to spend less/more time on?
Set and Protect Your Work/Life Boundaries.
As much as possible, YOU control your work, don’t let it control you. I know that some professions don’t seem to allow for this, but even doctors, police officers, restaurant owners, and other “on-call” people have hours off. Honor those off hours, even if you work remotely…especially if you work remotely. I know many parents who work remotely and it is really hard to turn off the job when it’s so accessible.Set those work hours and stick to them.
Once you’ve set them, learn to stop saying yes to everything that you feel you should do. Protect personal and family time like it’s a meeting on your schedule. And if possible, turn off notifications outside of work hours.
USE YOUR CALENDAR!
Schedule in exercise, dates with your spouse, family meal times, hobbies, and rest. Time-blocking makes space for what matters and cuts down on guilt about non-work activities.
Rest and Recharge.
Sleep should be a priority; 7-9 hours is best. During the day take short breaks of a few minutes. Even a 5-10 minute walk helps. Don’t be afraid to use your vacation days. Getting away gives you time to evaluate, process, plan ahead, and reset. It should also give you a chance to just BE without any agenda.
Live in the NOW.
Be more present with your kids. Put away the phone at meals. At work, focus on work; at home, put work away. Work on quality time that allows you to connect with each child and that does not look like you trying to multi-task while giving your kids your “attention.”
Look for Ways to Simplify and Delegate.
Look at your home and your calendar and ask yourself, where can I simplify? Start here:
What are some things that can be delegated to co-workers, family or to your kids?
What are things I can automate, like grocery delivering or bill paying?
What are areas where I don’t need to keep striving for perfection because that effort is taking up too much time and causing me stress? (maybe that’s trying to keep a squeaky clean house or feeling like you have to provide creative snacks for your kids and their friends)
Speak Up!
Talk to your boss about expectations if you are feeling overextended. Let your family know that you need their help and support. Clear communication always helps reduce guilt, resentment and burnout.
Speak up to yourself also. Reassess what is working and what is not when it comes to your work/life balance. Where do you need to make adjustments? What feels overwhelming right now?
Your work/life balance is important because, as the saying goes, you can’t pour from an empty cup. Your mental, physical and emotional health are affected by the lack of or presence of a work/life balance. And then, it’s not just YOU who is affected because your family will feel it too. If you feel like your balance is way out of whack, don’t ignore it any longer. Talk to someone. Call me for a free intro session here.
