How are you at making good parenting habits that stick? Many are full of good intentions when they set out to establish new habits. Kinda like making new year’s resolutions.
Whether you are trying to establish good habits in your sports parenting, in your job, at home. Or maybe you’re trying to help your child start good habits. Either way, the hardest part about habits is making them stick.
James Clear, author of the habit guide Transform Your Habits, says there is a framework that can make it easier for good habits to stick. He calls it the 3 Rs of Habit Change.
Clear suggests that every habit you–or your children–have follows a 3-step pattern:
- Reminder: the trigger that initiates the behavior
- Routine: the behavior itself, the action you take
- Reward: the benefit you gain from the behavior
Let’s use hunger as an example:
- Reminder: you feel your stomach growl. This is a reminder or a trigger that initiates the behavior.
- Routine: you make a sandwich. This is the actual behavior. When you are hungry, you eat.
- Reward: your stomach feel satisfied. This is the reward for the behavior.
When you see how a habit works, you can understand how to form new habits. Clear suggests a 3-step process:
- Step 1: Set a reminder for your new habit. Whether it’s associated with a behavior you do regularly, or a reminder on your daily to-do list.
- Step 2: Choose a habit that’s easy to start. We’re not talking life goals here, we’re talking about a bite-sized habit that is so easy that you really can’t say no to it.
In the beginning, performance doesn’t matter. Become the type of person who always sticks to your new habit. You can build up to the level of performance that you want once the behavior becomes consistent. (James Clear)
- Step 3: Celebrate. As Clear says, “Give yourself some credit and enjoy each success.” Tell yourself “good job” or say aloud “I did it!”
Establishing good habits is a process. Be patient with yourself. But be intentional. Good habits are worth it because they will shape you and your child’s destiny.
If you want to give your child a positive youth sports experience, one that will shape their destiny, start by making some good sports parenting habits. My new quick-read book 11 Habits of Happy and Positive Sports Parents will outline the habits you need to have to give your child the best season ever.